Personal Statement

Personal Statement

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Adventures in Party Planning: Fun With Graphic Design

Once upon a time, Santa surprised the McGlinchey children with an Alienware laptop (slightly used - those suckers are expensive), just like they use on The Big Bang Theory. Santa also surprised their mother with the gift of a second Alienware laptop, also slightly used, which came fully loaded with Photoshop, Lightroom and other cool editing software. Said laptop was purchased for a song - less than the software would have cost off of the shelf - and the idea was that Mom and Little Kid would share the tricked-out computer, with Little Kid to use it for little kid stuff and Mom to use it for design. However - more often than not - Mom (AKA "the creature of habit") would default back to her trusty Dell, leaving the Little Kid with full rein of the Alienware. Stupid, stupid, STUPID mom. Needless to say, the Little Kid (AKA "Godzilla") worked his special magic on "his" computer, which is no longer "operational." (It didn't take long for Big Kid to trash his, either.) All of that lovely, bleepin' expensive software - trapped, for all eternity. So Mom makes do with what she's got these days. Created and "sent" (electronically) the invitation for our Halloween party, above, via Paperless Post.  The Shining theme seemed like a natural fit:  "Redrum" became "Redtag" (a reference to the stupid City inspection tag that decorated our front window for most of the duration of construction - by the end, after months of sun-bleaching, it wasn't a red tag so much as a soft coral).

And we do intend to live in our new old house "forever, and ever, and ever."

While I was in a crafty mood, I made new Halloween totes for the boys, via Zazzle.  The Big Kid wanted to trick-or-treat "one last time" (yeah, right), but he made it clear that he was too mature for his old candy bucket.  For the record, it's not like I had saddled him with something cute and kidlike; his old bucket was a soft-sculpture zombie head, with glowing eyes.  Pretty timeless, if you ask me.  But he didn't ask me.  So - I opted for a canvas tote bag (the gusseted kind - like an LL Bean tote, with LOTS of candy-carrying capacity).  And, on that tote, I added:
 

"HANDS OFF MUH-STACHE OF CANDY."

Like a lot of boys his age, he's fascinated with mustaches.  So this was a hit.


I also took the liberty of starting a Paperless Post invitation for his thirteenth birthday party - but then waffled over whose phone number to fill in for the RSVP.  He was T-minus-two-days to smart phone liftoff at the time, so I just left a blank, and I guess we'll fill in his number.  IF he even e-mails the thing out to anyone.  He's on the fence:  "Mom, I could just call people - or tell them in person."  Yes, yes, you could - but that would involve Mom going cold turkey on the birthday invite thing.  The same mom who agonized for hours over handmade construction- and Thomas-themed cards (multi-layered!  tied with coordinating ribbon!) for you, and who killed a bazillion brain cells trying to think of text for the invitation to your "Aloha Scooby Doo" party. (Seriously?  Aloha Scooby Doo?  Out of all of the themes that you could have come up with?  Because there's nothing more "fun" than throwing a luau in November - at a bouncy-house place.  Trust me on this.  Yes, "fun" is in quotes for a reason.)

So, believe me when I tell you that the attempt below represents a tremendous amount of restraint on the part of your mother, and sensitivity to the fact that you are turning thirteen and are, therefore, all kinds of classy and mature.


Keep pushing me, kid, and I may ask you to reimburse me for that first Alienware laptop - and spot your brother the money for the second.

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