I have a morbid fascination with this Web site, where people post things that they are willing to do for $5, and you can pay them $5 and hire them to do those things. Yes, a number of the "things" are disgusting. But some of them are amusing in an undisgusting way.
For example, I like this post by QueSyrah:
I will happily be your cute blonde facebook wife for a month for $5. I will accept your FB request and be your pretty blonde wife for 31 days! Amaze and astound your family and friends. Confuse your ex. Or just keep them guessing. Next available time is October 13th! We could have a Zombie facebook wedding! <3 Much love~
This is QueSyrah.
I like her. I think I would enjoy being friends with her. She is pretty without being off-putting, and she obviously has a kick-butt sense of humor. But then, I could have figured that out from her handle, "QueSyrah." Gotta love a girl who enjoys a literate wine-based pun.
Wondering how, exactly, you would go about explaining the sudden disappearance of your hot wife from your FB page. Suppose you could have some fun making up stories about her untimely demise. But folks might take you a little too seriously. I could totally see this turning into a very special episode of Dateline.
Other current posts that I like:
I will teach you how to write hip hop and rap like a professional via Skype for $5. (And here I thought that these guys had a natural gift.)
I will make an emotional rant for $5. (Thanks, but I am perfectly capable of composing my own emotional rants. Or, sometimes, I just wing it and freestyle.)
I will spend you a postcard from Bogota, Columbia with any message you wish in Spanish for $5. (Um, that's . . . specific. I guess this would come in handy if you hired an imaginary hot, blonde wife for a month and explained her sudden disappearance from your Facebook page with a story about her relocating to Bogota, Columbia - where, um, Internet service is sort of spotty. So they send postcards instead of Facebook messages.)
I will make you a tiny yarn hat for $5.
Seriously? Lemme see.
Yup, that's tiny. And made of yarn. And definitely a hat.
I will crochet you a tiny hat. You can use this tiny hat to keep your fingertip warm on those chilly days, avoid blisters on your spacebar thumb, a nose warmer, ornament....the possibilities are possibly endless! One fiver for one hat. Pompom optional. Please indicate if you'd like the pompom or not.
Good, sweet Lord, I love Fiverr.