Kid Stuff: Brother-Free Weekend

It's kind of exciting when your big brother leaves town to attend a church retreat.  Because that means having Mom and Dad all to yourself.

It's less exciting when Mom and Dad drag you to the house-in-progress and make you wait while they inspect bathroom tile:

Continuing the downward spiral:  Mom drives you back to the apartment, and doesn't realize that she left her  apartment keys at the house until you have pulled into the garage.  Fortunately, Mom doesn't clean out the trunk of her car that often.  It only took a few seconds of digging to locate a still-in-the-package Star Wars kite:

By the time Dad showed up with a backup set of keys, the kite was assembled and aloft, and Mom had shed her work shoes and was enjoying the feel of grass between her toesies.

We had a little bit of a meltdown at bedtime, when it clicked that we would be sleeping alone, without a brother for company . . . in a bedroom on the other side of the apartment from Mom and Dad's.  But slumber ultimately was achieved.  Around 7 am, Mom opened her eyes to find a small face inches away from hers.  Mom managed not to scream.

"You're up early, PJ."

"No, I'm not.  We always get up this early.  And we keep each other company until you guys get up.  But this morning YOU have to keep me company."

Fair enough.

Mom and Son watched a new episode of "Young Justice."  Cereal was consumed.  Dad ultimately was roused, and Son was dispatched to Nana's for a few hours while Mom and Dad tackled various yard and carriage house projects.  (Son was given the option of helping.  Son declined.  Mom and Dad were less than surprised.)

After dinner on Saturday, it was time for an epic superhero battle.  Mom was assigned the villains:  The Riddler, Joker, Clayface, Ra's al Ghul and his League of Assassins (okay, technically, they are Imaginext ninjas, but Mom thinks they count), a not-to-scale Penguin (we couldn't find his action figure, so we substituted a Pillow Pet) and . . . um . . . the alien from "Alien Versus Predator."  No, not part of the DC Universe, but since PJ took some artistic license, Mom was entitled to take some as well.

Oops - forgot Metallo with the kung-fu grip:

PJ got Batman and Robin - of course.

He also got Hawkman, The Flash, Green Lantern - and Obi-Wan Kenobi, several Stormtroopers and a handful of Transformers.

(Yes, I pointed out that Stormtroopers are bad guys.  I was told to stop being so technical.)

PJ got the newer of our Bat Caves and Planet Oa, and I got Joker's Fun House and the old Bat Cave (which we decided was "Bizarro Bat Cave").  Then we got down to business.

"Not so fast, Ice Batman.  Your beefy bicep is no match for my kung-fu grip."

 
PJ retaliated by taking out one of my ninja assassins.

And then he unveiled his secret weapon:  Ace the Batdog.  Being our actual dog.

Round 1 of "Penguin Versus Ace" went to Ace.

Round 2 went to Penguin:

The battle ultimately was declared a draw.

Then Clayface ate Robin:

Then PJ ate Clayface.

Crunch.

Mom attacked with a lethal blow - she made Batman wear a floppy red hat.

Victory was declared.  Not really.  There's only one rule to epic superhero battle:  the Little Kid must win.  Mom conceded defeat.  Cookies were consumed.  Justice League videos were also consumed.

Brother-free weekend was pronounced a success.