Personal Statement
Friday, April 20, 2012
Kid Stuff: The Guyble
[Scene: The backseat of Mom's car.]
Little Kid, apropos of nothing: You know, getting into a fight with a girl is a lose-lose. If you lose, you're a wimp, and if you win -
Little Kid and Big Kid in chorus: You're a jerk.
Little Kid: JINX! You owe me a soda.
[Editor's note: I have told him a thousand times that the correct phrase is "buy me a Coke." He insists on paraphrasing. On account of how he is not a big fan of Coke, and, also, on account of how his brother is unemployed and possessing of limited funds, so realistically his brother won't buy him a soda so much as hand over one that he has appropriated from us.]
Mom from the front seat: Okay, you both said that like you'd heard it somewhere. Was it on a TV show?
Big Kid: Nope, it's from the Guyble.
Mom: The . . . Guyble?
Big Kid: Yup.
Mom: As in, "guy Bible"?
Little Kid: Yes. It's a thing, Mom. IT EXISTS. ON THE INTERNET.
Mom: So, it's a Web site? Like Bro Codes?
Big Kid: Bro Codes is a CHAPTER of the Guyble, Mom. Like Dude-a-ronomy.
Mom: Is Dude-a-ronomy really a thing?
Big Kid: Yup.
Little Kid: Mom, is there such a thing as a Girlble?
Mom: Did you say gerbil?
Little Kid: NO. GIRL-BLE. Like, a girl Bible?
Mom: Yes, it's called Seventeen Magazine. Well, that's the Old Testament equivalent. I guess Cosmo would be your New Testament. Never mind, let's not get into that.
On my to-do list: checking out The Guyble. Suspecting that it is targeted to a slightly older audience than my boys, but kinda intrigued, and also more than a bit amused.
[Gerbil anatomy chart courtesy of enchantedlearning.com.]
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