Monday, May 9, 2011
Kid Stuff: Conversation Starter
At a three-year old's birthday party. All of the older boys are playing video games in the birthday girl's brother's room, but somehow my six year-old son finds himself cut from the herd and in said birthday girl's room, where said birthday girl and a female friend are playing house and indulging in other girly activities, involving sunglasses and sparkly handbags. Six year-old looks like he will do anything to get out of the room, the expression on his face bringing to mind my second favorite David Letterman "Top Ten List" entry ("Top Ten Fears of Snuggles the Fabric Softener Bear: #10, Might have to chew own leg off to escape from lint trap"). Birthday Girl drifts out of the room, leaving my boy and just the one girl.
Parker springs into action:
"How old are you?"
"Ohhhhkay. So . . . when I'm eleven, you'll be nine. DISCUSS."
Four year-old girl scrunches her face in noncomprehension. Parker takes his opening and bolts from the room, leaving the four year-old girl to discuss the topic with . . . no one. (Well, me, because - not one to leave a girl hanging - I offered to play dolls with her at this point.)
In case you were wondering:
1. Yes, my child has seen the Mike Myers "Coffee Talk" skit. Several times. The McGlincheys are a Mike Myers-loving people - Parker in particular. You should see him do Dr. Evil. It's pretty hilarious.
2. Yes, he employed the patented Linda Richman "DISCUSS" hand gesture (palm open and outward, wrist circling to create a little window-washing motion).
3. My favorite Top Ten List entry is "Top Ten Christmas Movies in Times Square: #10, 'Hot Buttered Elves.'"
4. Yes, I have noticed that I tend to favor the first item on Dave's Top Ten Lists.
True story: as a newly minted Law Review member, I was made to do office hours one Saturday. Some of the more sociable third-years (I should put "sociable" in quotes - it was a sliding scale) invited me to grab lunch with them at a place around the corner from the law school. One of them (they were all male) was sort of cute if you squinted (disclaimer: this was right before I met my spouse). During lunch, the topic of Top Ten Lists came up, and Sort of Cute Guy offered the completely unsolicited opinion that "Hot Buttered Elves" was the single funniest Top Ten List entry of all time. I think my jaw may have flopped open. What were the odds? Was this a sign? Was I now required to marry this man, solely on the basis of our shared taste in Top Ten List entries?
Yeah, he was only Sort of Cute. And, again, it wasn't long before I met my spouse, with whom I shared a lot of eerie coincidences and personal preferences. Including a love for SNL comedians. And, apparently, through some combination of nature and nurture, that love has been passed down to our darling second child.